Simmer Down

He said,

Simmer down! Simmer. Down.

Simmer under the lid. You can be very, very hot. But you must never, ever boil over. Keep it under, never over. Keep it in, never out. Simmer down never up. Down into involuntary silence, invisible rage. And whatever you do? Never bubble up with laughter so loud that others turn to find the face making a sound of joy. Or fun. Or happiness. God forbid you make a sound that makes people turn around so simmer down.

Simmer down under yourself–where you can make sounds, but never have a voice. Simmer down into the bottom of the yourself, remain warm, keep your pulse, but just listen. Stay alert. Cause you know I am coming back for the part that fires up. When we are alone.

She shrank, as all women do when silenced out of their skin. She shrank down into the belief that her very Being was too loud for the world. She simmered down. Reflex. Then, out of necessity, she shut down, knowing that if she were altogether quiet he would give up simmering her down.

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